Friday, January 29, 2010

With Facebook friends like these...

Gosh, Daisy sure seems like a nice girl. Do you---do you think she really likes me?

The best part about this is that when I first received the request from this porn spam / identity theft bot, "she" had three friends. When I returned three minutes later to memorialize her for this blog post, she had 11. Of those 11, I'd bet six of these guys knew she was fake but figured "fuck it, at least now I can come back whenever I want and look at this twat shot."

By my calculations that leaves five dudes who might really think she's real and that maybe, if they play their cards right, they just might get to dive in... and of those, I'd say at least two pathetic colonoscopy bags who are so blinded by their own deluded self-absorption that they truly believe A) this sluttily appealing, morally bankrupt girl is real; and B) they are just "so money" that of the tens of millions of men on Facebook, she just can't contain her inhibitions and dreams of spreading her legs for THEM.

Which makes it all the more hilarious that they might surrender vital personal information in the process.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Enjoy the thrilling adventure of escaping slavery--from the comfort of your own living room!

Monopoly? Not in this economy. Chutes & Ladders? Pfffft. has really hit a home run with this one!

Kudos on the artwork too. The black silhouettes (complete with hobo stick) tip-toeing for their lives. Also note the celebratory dance of freedom (or perhaps she's just been shot). And what a raw deal for all those slaves who missed out on what appears to have been the "Caribbean Cruise to Freedom" option. Thanks for nothing, Harriet Tubman!

Keep an eye out for other great games from Amazon, including Hungry Hungry Auschwitz Prisoners!

Thanks to Black Static for the heads-up.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Street sledding

Proof that you don't have to be smart to be a lawyer (in case there was ever any doubt):

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

I'm BAAAAAAACK (for better or for worse)

Although it is against my better professional judgment to once again take up the reigns of this rambling mess, I feel empty inside without it. Plus, the 120-character Twitter allotment isn't nearly enough room for the daily rants I have in my head.

It's been quite a journey since I began this blog in January 2007 in an effort to distract myself from the idea of suicide while I waited my first semester law school grades. But, law students everywhere, hear this: consider this proof that you too can get through law school (and maybe even with a decent GPA), graduate, get a job, and study for and pass the bar exam (all at a cost to you of a mere six-figure debt!). And if that doesn't sound like 3+ years of sexy fun, then I just don't know what sexy fun is anymore.

Someone recently accused me of being "the grumpiest Facebook status updater ever." I have been called this (and worse) by many people, and not just recently. And I kind of take a shine to it. But whatever the underlying psychological reasons may be, I need an outlet to bash the moronic things I encounter or observe on a daily basis... so let's get to it.

A sportswriter / general shennanigan-haver pal Twittered today regarding the Gilbert Arenas suspension:

"Arenas suspended indefinitely. That sound you hear is Earl Boykins crawling out of a duffle bag."